Introducing… the Distract-o-Box 3000!

It comes in six bright distracting colors!

It has a beautiful shiny distracting screen!

It has stereo speakers for making distracting noises!

What’s it for?

Distracting!

Need to concentrate on that task at work?
Ting! Hey look, a picture of feet… on the beach! Whoa!

Trying to learn something new?
Bong! Wait up, Taco Braille reminds you there’s a digital coupon!

Just another hour of focus and you’ll reach your goal?
Bleeup bleeup! By the way, low battery, fellah! Go scramble for a charger and plug me in!

Need a good night’s rest?
Hey bro, hold on a min! Engage your thumb on an endless scroll of trivia interspersed with occasional crumbs of mild humor!

Distract-o-Box 3000 can be yours for only $1099, plus an additional monthly service fee of $135 a month, forever.

Distract-o-Box 3000. Get yours, today!